If you’re fortunate enough to be
involved in a relationship, whether it’s budding like the spring roses we’re
dreaming about or, mature like the fully flowering, tall magnolia trees we have
in the South, celebrate Valentine’s Day with your partner. Yes, we’ve had to
compromise, cajole, and capitulate from time to time. As have our partners.
Today is a day to put all that aside.
Valentine’s Day is the perfect
moment to rewind the tape. Do you remember the moment you knew this person was
different from all the others, so special you could barely catch your breath? “You fly down a street on the chance that you meet, and you meet --
not really by chance.”
Recall the moment when you
realized your feelings were mutual. No words, no song, no kaleidoscope filled
with glorious colors can match that feeling. Yes, and there was the excitement
and the worry about meeting your partner’s friends. What if they said you
weren’t good enough? Then you met your partner’s family with bone chilling
fear, praying they wouldn’t vote you off the island, to use today’s idiom.
Think back to the day you asked
for her hand in marriage. Or, you waited by the window, hoping to see him
coming up the walk with a tiny box in his hand that simply had to be the ring,
the thing that would seal the deal. You looked deeply into each other's eyes
that day, nervously searching for signs of doubt, yet confident that your heart,
filled with love, would overcome all. This is the one. There will never be
someone better.
Ah, the wedding, the sacred
ceremony, the promises…to have and to
hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in
sickness and health, until death do us part. And the celebration afterwards; Oh
what a night! Champagne toasts, an embroidered lace wedding cake, and rice for
good luck and abundance. Now, when was the last time you looked at the photos you
so patiently posed for, gowned and tuxedoed? Never mind you aren’t so young
anymore. Never mind you misplaced them; never mind you feel silly. It’s
Valentine’s Day. Do it.
In the early years, celebrating Valentine’s Day was fun. You enjoyed
each other’s company, you were building something together; starting a family
(how many families got started on February 14th, I wonder?) Dinner
dates, boxes of candy, flowers, a snazzy necktie and always, an extravagant
card to remind you of the magic you felt whenever your partner came into view.
Time passes and the years fly by. Kids grow up; you cherish victories
together and yes, bear defeats, unimaginable when you were young. You worry
about your health, money, careers that end before they’re over. Sadly, some of
us turn inward rather than facing the oncoming storms together. Worse, you
forget there are joys yet to unfold.
What kept you together all these years? Look closely and it isn’t hard
to see the roots, deep, strong, entwined and seemingly unbreakable. Valentine’s
Day may not cure what ails us. But, if you woke up this morning with someone
who rocked your world once upon a time, maybe it’s time to wake up and make the
most of every moment you have together. Maybe you haven’t exchanged a
Valentine’s Day card for years, having convinced yourself, and each other, that
it isn’t worth the time or expense. That it’s nothing more than a marketers
hustle. Did you think that way on your first Valentine’s Day together?
Whether you’re in May or the
September of your years, realize that time has a way of slipping by. As the
song says, when the autumn weather turns the leaves to flame, you haven’t got time for
the waiting game. It’s Valentine’s Day. Celebrate the day together. Say I love
you to the one who matters most. And if per chance you’re alone this year,
revel in a sweet memory. While you’re at it though, do keep your eyes open for
the chance that you meet…a new valentine of your own.
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