Sinatra Does American Idol

What if Frank Sinatra came back and tried out for American Idol? After all, Frank was the original American Idol back in the forties. His career ran for more than 50 years and his music is sill heard around the world today, some 12 years after his death.
What would it be like for The Chairman of the Board to sing in front of Kara, Randy and Simon? Try to imagine the scene. It’s New York City. You can see Hoboken from the studio’s windows overlooking the Hudson.
Simon asks, “Who do we have here?”
“I’m Frank Sinatra and I’m your next American Idol.”
“Well, we’ll see Frank. Before you tell us what you plan to sing, who are these gentlemen in the dark suits with you?”
“That’s Vinny and Alonzo,” Frank says with significance. “They’re part of my family.”
“Well that’s highly unusual Frank. We don’t usually allow that sort of thing.”
“Make an exception.”
Wanting to keep things moving, Randy pipes up. “What are you going to sing for us Frank?”
“I’m going to sing a Cole Porter tune, I’ve Got You Under My Skin.”
Kara: “Do you mean the Four Seasons version Frank?”
“Kara you really ring my bell doll, but please, I just ate lunch. This is an arrangement done especially for me by swingin’ Nelson Riddle.”
“Who may I ask is Nelson Riddle? Simon asks.
Frank smiles but his eyes are icy blue. He glances at Alonzo who takes a step forward. Simon averts his eyes and mumbles, “Can we just get on with it?”
♫ “I’ve got you under my skin, I’ve got you deep in the heart of me…”♫
“Thanks Frank, very interesting but you know Dawg, it was a little pitchy.”
“Oh, I loved it,” Kara gushes, “His voice has a quality that is hard to define. I felt like he was singing just to me.”
“I was singing to you Kara -with the long and melodious Italian last name. I’ll be thinking about you until the wee small hours of the morning learnin’ the blues tonight. You could fly me to the moon, doll.”
“Alright Frank. Your voice does have an interesting quality but I think you need lots of practice. I simply don’t see you as the next American Idol. A saloon singer perhaps,” It was Simon, suddenly remembering that the show had its own security staff.
“I am a saloon singer Simon and a good one. I’m the best there is. Listen to this:
♫ It’s a quarter to three, there’s no one in the place but you and me so set-em up Joe…” ♫
“Hey I liked that one Dawg,” Randy jumps in. “Let’s hear something a little more current Frank.”
“Sure I can do that. This one’s called New York New York.”
“Hold on a minute Frank. You were just beginning to change my mind a little about letting you move forward, but no one has ever been able to sing that song but that guy who sings it after every New York Yankee baseball game. Karaoke bars have removed that song from their play list because too many drunks shattered the eardrums of onlookers trying to sing it. It can’t be done Frank. Don’t you have something else?”
“Simon baby I can sing New York, New York and knock your black socks off, but I’ll save it for when I get to the finals in a few months.”
Simon and Randy look at each other. Kara is putting more makeup on. “What’s it going to be then Frank?” Simon asks.
“I’m going to do a Rolling Stones number, Sympathy for the Devil…Just kidding guys and dolls, here’s one you’ll like…”
♫ “Strangers in the night exchanging glances, wondering in the night what were the chances we’d be sharing love…♫
“Let’s vote!” Kara screams.
Randy smiles. “You got something man. Still a little pitchy but I think you should go to Hollywood. Simon?”
“What can I say?” Simon answers, casting a wary eye on Vinny and Alonzo. “You’ll never make it in this business with that voice Frank. You’re not really a singer but Kara is already bewitched bothered and bewildered so it’s a yes.”

Copyright 2010 Len Serafino. All rights reserved.